It's been a little while since my last blog - I've been engrossed in being a mother - but it is time to blog again!
Last week was an interesting week. Emily decided, out of nowhere, to start crying when it was time to breastfeed. On Thursday night we sat down in the glider with the boppy for the last feeding before bedtime. She ate from one side just fine, but then, when I put her to my other boob (I don't know how else to say that...) she started screaming. Not just a little whiny cry, but a full on bawling screamfest. No matter how I positioned her she wouldn't stop. I could tell she was still hungry but nothing would get her to stop crying. At first I thought, maybe she is just gassy, so I burped her for a while. Then I tried baby gas x. She still cried every time the boob got near her. My mom was over so she was trying to help, but nothing she did worked either. Once Emily was crying, there was no stopping it at all. I got frustrated, snapped at Mom, she left to give us some space. Mike came in and after about 45 minutes Emily calmed down, kind of. It took another 2 hours to get her to go to sleep.
The feedings that took place throughout the night were fine, so I thought it was an isolated incident. But no. I couldn't be so lucky. The next day, starting with the 7 a.m. feeding she was all tears again. I ended up ditching the boppy pillow, sitting hunched over on the floor and after about 45 minutes of trying she finally settled down to eat. Then she was all smiles.
Each feeding throughout the day was pretty much the same. They got a little better each time as I relearned what Emily would and wouldn't tolerate. I have no idea what changed. The only thing I can think of is that she is taking a bottle more often now that the nanny is here. Perhaps she was confused? It does happen. But she ate just fine once she latched so who knows...
What I can say is this. As a mom when you are trying to comfort your baby and nothing works it is a very difficult thing. When you are trying to feed her and she is screaming around your nipple, it is even worse. The logical part of me knew that something was wrong on her end, that I should be comforting her. After all, how frustrating it must be when you can't communicate at all other than to scream. But the emotional side of me felt rejected. Horribly rejected. After a full day of this I went over to my sister-in-law's house. She has 2 kiddos. One is almost 2 and the other is about 4 months old. I figured if anyone could understand what I was going through it would be her. And I needed some sympathy.
Lucky for me, the feeding situation worked itself out. As long as I no longer use the boppy pillow, we don't have any problems. Perhaps it was the angle? Who knows...
What I learned at Katie's was life changing. It has only been a few days, but those few days have been amazing. See, lately Emily gets fussy around 8 p.m. And she fusses till she falls asleep at about 11. We try to get her to go to bed at 8, but it just takes forever to get her there. And there is usually a fair amount of crying on the way. Mike is usually the one to handle the baby this time of night since he doesn't get to see her while he is at work. And it is very hard for him that she fusses so much when he has her - even though he knows it is just because she is overtired.
Katie and John gave me a DVD called the Happiest Baby on the Block as a shower gift. I had already read the book so I thought I didn't really need to watch the DVD. Boy was I wrong. Katie suggested I watch it, and when I did i realized that we could improve on how we comforted Emily. Something was totally lost in translation in the text version. The video made it painfully obvious.
Sunday was the first night I used the technique. Emily had been crying on and off for about 3 and a half hours. She would fall asleep, wake herself up, then cry some more. I used the methods in the DVD and she fell deeply asleep within 5 minutes. And she stayed asleep. Granted it was midnight by then, but it was still a victory.
Last night she started to fuss around 8 again. I applied the techniques and whala! She was calm within about 30 seconds and asleep in about 10 minutes. She slept from 8:30 until 1:30, got up to feed, then went right back to sleep. If it was Christmas, I would say it was a Christmas Miracle! But it was only Halloween and I don't think there is a Halloween Miracle.
Anyway, a special thank you to Jon and Katie for giving me that DVD. And a extra special thank you to Katie for encouraging me to watch it. Now Mike and I get some time to ourselves in the evening. Something I am sure every parent cherishes.
For any baby parent or soon to be parent reading this: do not pass go. Go directly to Amazon and buy that DVD. It will make your life so much easier. And you wont have the heartache of trying desperately to calm a baby with no effect.
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